There’s a special little girl in
the smack center of my life. She’s is so
amazing to me. Last February she turned
two, and she lights up the life of everyone around her. I am blessed to be the one who raises her and
who receives so much of her attention, but by birth I am not her mother.
Her birth mother is my daughter
Rebecca, and Todd (my husband) and I adopted her when she was almost one. (That
is a hundred page book for another time!)She knows all her family and she
understands her world. Her grandpa/dad “Paw
Paw” is the apple of her eye, and her smile makes one feel that everything is
alright in the world! Her nick name is
Tory Joy, but most times it is just Tory, or “TOOOOORY!” if she’s poking fun or
bossing her uncle/brother around (which is one of her favorite pastimes). She knows how to tease, she knows just how to
tickle anyone and make them squirm, she knows just what ridiculous things to
laugh at, and which ones just get a little giggle or a big smile. She absolutely treasures her ‘Aunt Hopie’ (my
16 year old daughter), and she has the softest golden haired waves I’ve ever
seen! She loves to be outside as much as
anyone will possibly let her, and her favorite playmate is her cousin Alex who
is nineteen days older than her. (They are affectionately known as the ‘womb
warped’ twins.)
But she would not be alive if not
for the sacrifices my daughter made at eighteen years old.
You see, she did not want to be
pregnant, and she was not ready to be a mom.
She could not deal with her life, and she had more issues than her
father or I knew how to handle. Besides
many things I will not mention here, she basically had dropped out of high
school, and had no way to support herself or a child. Her friends at the time were in the same
place she was, and we still have no clue who Tory’s birth father is.
She did a few things right,
though. One big one was giving life to
my Tory. The second was choosing,
through many nights and tears and awake moments, to ask her father and I to
adopt her when she realized she was in no position to give to Tory what this
little precious child deserves.
Now I don’t know of what persuasion
you are on the issues of how a young pregnant girl decides between life and
death, but personally, being like Tory, born to a very confused and unprepared
teenager, I am glad for the gift of life.
Tory, like I was to my parents, was a gift to Todd and I, and we, like my Mom
and Dad, are entrusted with her precious care.
It makes her all the more special, and has given a special thankfulness for
my Rebecca that will never go away. My
mom once spoke to me about the same feelings for my birth mother, even though
she had never met her at that time.
So when I hold my precious girl all
these things go through my mind. The
whole pro life/pro choice debate goes on, but looking at my Tory I have a very
different perspective. My daughter could
have chosen, as many girls do, to end Tory’s life before she was ever born and
I wouldn’t have known, but I would have been robbed of knowing such a wonderful
little girl. My birth mother, if she had
gotten pregnant just a few years later than she did, could have done the same
thing to me. The world would have never
been ‘graced’ with my entire family.
I’ve been blessed and honored to be
both Grandma and Mommy to this precious little girl. Tory was given the gift of life by my
daughter as well as the Creator. Something
to think about.
I am not here to change your
opinion just a final question I want to ask you to ponder—even if you do not
agree with my persuasion. It is not the
typical question of choice, or ‘It’s a child not a choice.’ It’s more of ‘What
does the child deserve?’ or ‘What if I was that child? What would I want?’ maybe even 'Who's life, if the child's life is ended, would be left empty or more unfulfilled?'
I’ll leave you to contemplate, as I
do so much when I look at my precious, precious girl.
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